Forget Buyer’s Remorse! Did you know that Carpal Tunnel Syndrome is one of the leading maladies affecting first time home buyers? Post-escrow disability claims have reached an all-time high!
Agents, you’ve seen it a thousand times. Fresh-faced clients sitting down to sign away with the best of intentions. Promising to read it all, understand it all and do the right thing while trying to do the write thing and put their signatures on page after page of dizzying disclosures and endless cover your ass documents straight out of the Office of Cosmic Redundancy. Sometimes it seems like, before you can even strap a Dixie Cup onto their chins to catch the drool, they’ve already lapsed into a vegetative state of comatose compliance and injured themselves in their rabid desire to do anything necessary in order to be done.
Why wait to buy your clients a house-warming present after they move into their new house. Give the gift that keeps on giving … before-hand. This specially-adapted, ergonomically-enhanced, “Escrow Glove” was developed from the tried and true principles of the bowling glove. Our Real Estate Doctors understood that anything designed to protect the fragile human hand and wrist assembly while tossing a sixteen pound ball down a long, slippery alleyway was well-suited to protect against the rigors of the kind rote signing that John Hancock never could have imagined. (They also did not want anyone else’s signature ending up as bad as their own.) Try the ESCROW GLOVE. It’s perfect protection for life in the fast lane of escrow sign-offs.
Free box of funny-face Dixie Cups with every purchase!
Hi Tom,
These are very funny…. I love your sense of humor…escrow glove, chicken spanking… what will you think of next?